By Arnab Dey
Remembering with intention and grace our deceased loved ones is a profound experience. It’s a process that helps us honor the memories, celebrate the lives, and find peace amidst grief.
Yet, how we choose to remember can shape the healing journey—approaching remembrance with intention and grace offers a meaningful way to keep our loved ones close in heart and spirit.
How To Remember Your Deceased Loved Ones For Healing
Losing a loved one is probably one of the most difficult things a human being can face. There is nothing in this world that can fill the space left by someone’s death. Still, life needs to go on.
For life to go on, healing becomes a paramount detail. You cannot live a life burdened with sadness, guilt, and so on. You need to move on with vigor and purpose. Then, should we forget those who have passed on to the other side?
Definitely no. However, we need to learn the ‘remembering with intention and grace’ method. This is a way of mourning or grieving that remembers a person with happiness. It not only helps the grieving individual to remember the ones they lost, but also helps them be consistent on the healing journey.
Then again, healing is a deeply personal detail. Therefore, you need to understand that there is no cookie-cutter program when it comes to healing. We will discuss some generalized means of remembering with intention and grace, but you should be the one to steer the ship.
Creating A Memorial Space
The first thing that should help someone to remember with intention and grace is by creating a memorial space for them. The memorial space need not be lavish or anything, it just needs to be earnest in its execution.
If your loved ones have been cremated, then consider placing their remains in an urn and creating a mantlepiece. However, if they were buried, consider making a small shrine that resonates with their life.
Try to place the memorial in the room where they spent most of their time. This is a great way to honor and remember with intention and grace.
Placing A Memorial Bench
This is intended solely for those who have been buried. If you often visit their graveside and talk to them, it is logical to place a bench nearby. This can be a functional monument that also holds a deeper meaning.
While creating a memorial bench, consider placing it near the grave. This is a poignant reminder that even in passing, you miss them and yearn to spend time with them. Therefore, consider this silent yet powerful gesture.
This changes the dynamic of the passing. Their death does not discredit the happy memories of their lives and the ones you miss.
Creating Meaningful Memorials
One way to remember with intention and grace is through creating meaningful memorials that reflect the essence of those we cherish. Memorials serve as physical or symbolic spaces where memories can be nurtured and shared.
Choosing a memorial that resonates personally can be a healing experience. It might be a traditional monument, a community garden, or something more unique, such as A Living Tribute memorial.
These living memorials combine the beauty of nature with remembrance, offering a growing, breathing symbol of life and legacy.
Build Something To Honor Them
When we say ‘building something,’ we do not want you to erect a 20-foot monument in the middle of the road, or something equally extravagant. Then again, we suggest creating something that can help you remember their likeness.
Consider hiring an artist to create something personal. For example, if your loved ones loved rocks or had a hobby, consider building them a small shrine that reflects that affection. This approach is not just personal, but is also quite healing.
You can even create a small fountain in your backyard that houses Koi fish, a symbol of perseverance. Whatever you choose, do not select something that does a disservice to their memory.
Plant A Tree
This suggestion comes from a very personal place. We are eternally trapped in the cycle of life and death. There is nothing beyond this cycle. Therefore, planting something in their name or on their grave is about remembering with intention and grace.
Whenever you plant a tree, you are silently acknowledging something crucial to the entire discussion. You are admitting that they are not gone, but they are here in a different form—a form that might not be a human form, but still ripe with life.
Personally, this can be quite healing and give their memory a purpose
Keep Giving
One way to remember with intention and grace is by engaging in acts of charity. If your departed loved ones made significant contributions to nonprofit organizations, we ask that you continue their legacy of service.
An old Japanese proverb says, “May your death benefit all beings.” The meaning behind this statement is that nobody’s death should go in vain. Something good must come out of it. Take over this onus for your loved one and consider doing some good.
This is a great way to heal and remember your loved ones with purpose. Therefore, benefitting all beings.
Keep Some Of Their Possessions
Your loved one’s possessions are not just things. They have transcended that stage and have become something more. Honor them by keeping their possessions for your loved one. Something that can help you remember their passing.
These possessions might just be trinkets. However, if you preserve them with emotional weight, they become something more. They become a beacon of their memories—a symbol of the one who is not there with you.
This subtle closure can help you, as a grieving individual, to move on and heal the void left behind.
Remembering Should Not Be Painful
Remembering with intention and grace can be a challenging path to follow. The very journey of healing is not supposed to be an easy one. Therefore, the most important thing about the whole situation is to approach each day with caution and care.
Take each day one at a time and don’t rush the healing process. Otherwise, you are simply doing yourself and the memory of your loved ones a disservice.
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